A.k.a "The Essay Marking Song", as sung by Snape as he works away. (Click here to read original "Not Gonna Get Us" lyrics)

Not gonna get passed
That's not gonna get passed
Not gonna get passed
Not gonna get passed
Not gonna get passed
That’s not gonna get passed
That’s not gonna get passed
Not gonna get passed
That’s not gonna get passed
Not gonna get passed!

Starting from here, I read ten errors
Totally abysmal, to simply be honest
Ink’s started to run, there’s no punctuation
No word follows a line, much letter fluctuation

Soon it will be covered with corrections
Beyond a joke, this must be a reflection
Of your complete lack of attention
To every thing I’ve tried to teach you

Nothing would pass this, not now, I’ve seen it
That’s not gonna get passed,
That’s not gonna get passed
Nothing would pass this, not now, and I mean it
That’s not gonna get passed,
That’s not gonna get passed
That’s not gonna get passed
(Not..)
That’s not gonna get passed, gonna get passed, gonna get passed..
(Not gonna get passed)
That’s not gonna get passed (gonna get passed, gonna get passed!)
Not gonna get passed
Not gonna get passed, gonna get passed.
Not gonna get passed
NOT GONNA GET PASSED, GONNA GET PASSED!
(Not gonna get passed)
Get passed, get passed..
(Not gonna get passed)

Not gonna get passed
Not gonna get passed

The point is astray, it should have been simple
A simple acne brew, not causing a pimple
You rushed ahead, but your head was too empty
I feel bile rise, I’m NOT going to pass this

My distain growing, why add a feather?
Seeing as instead, you should have added leather
Not giving this back, you need detention
I hope it will help
Your in-class attention

Not gonna get passed, gonna get passed, gonna get passed (gonna get.. get passed.)
Not gonna get passed (gonna get.. gonna get..)
Not gonna get passed, gonna get passed..
Not gonna get passed

Noone would pass this, not now, it’s dire
That’s not gonna get passed,
That’s not gonna get passed

- This is the point where Snape sets the essay on fire -

Nothing could fix this, not now, it’s a’fire
That’s not gonna get passed,
That’s not gonna get passed
That’s not gonna get passed
(Not gonna get passed
That’s not gonna get passed, gonna get passed
That’s not gonna get passed
(Not gonna get passed)
Not gonna get passed, get passed
Not gonna get passed, get passed
Not gonna get passed "